Backpacked: The inexplicable need to bring everything in his desk home to complete a 2 sided work sheet.

Home-Work: The hours of reviewing spelling words with your youngster that annoys you almost as much as that hole in the wall left behind after from your husband’s latest DIY project gone awry.

Stud-y: That kid in your daughter’s class she threw a tantrum when you made her invite him to her birthday party last year, but over the summer he had a growth spurt, made the soccer team, and now his name is scribbled all over her notebooks.

Eraser: What you wish your mind would do after a meeting with your son’s teacher regarding the stunt he pulled in homeroom.

Flash Cards: Index cards with the definitions your son needs to memorize for his science test that take you five hours to make—yet he only spends twenty minutes studying with them.

Fill-in-the-Blanks: What you are constantly trying to do after you ask your child about what they did in school today.

Parent-Teacher Conferences: The bi-yearly event that causes even you anxieties, didn’t teachers stop intimidating you after you graduated? I mean, you are allowed to call your child lazy, but that 23-year old rookie teacher, who does she think she is?!? And by the way, Johnny’s Civil War diarama that took you 10 hours to complete did not lack originality!

After School Activities: You think they consist of Social Studies reports, Science experiments, and Math problems. Your child thinks they are Nintendo Wii and the new Hannah Montana episode.